The Honeymoon That Changed Everything

As I was moving through my first trimester (and if you've missed it, we're expecting a baby. More on that later in this blog) I took a little break from social media.

My brain simply wasn't working the way it normally does. I struggled to think clearly, I had very little energy, and most days I just wanted to be by myself. Everything in me was turning inward and, without really planning it, I stepped away from sharing online for a while. Now that I'm leaving the first trimester behind me, I can finally feel the energy returning. My creativity is slowly finding its way back too, and I'd love to catch you up on everything that happened over the past three months.

So let's pick up where we left off…

The Morning After

The wedding. The one we didn't really plan, yet somehow turned out to be exactly what we had hoped for. If you haven't read that story yet, you can catch up here if you'd like: Our wedding story

The next morning we went back to the venue to clear everything away. We had organised the entire wedding ourselves, so naturally we were also the ones packing it all up again. A couple of friends came to help us and together we folded tables, stacked chairs, collected glasses and loaded everything back into the cars.

I actually loved doing it.

The room still looked like our wedding, just twenty-four hours later. There were lipstick marks on wine glasses, handwritten wishes on beer coasters, flowers scattered across the tables and chairs standing in places where someone had clearly pulled them aside during dinner or dancing. Every little detail reminded us of the evening before. It gave us one last chance to soak it all in before life moved on.

Too Full to Open Anything

By the time we got home it was already late afternoon. Our living room was filled with cards and presents waiting for us. We opened a few of them, but quickly realised we couldn't take much more in. We'd experienced so much love over the previous days that our minds simply needed a little time to catch up.

I could feel the tears sitting just below the surface, but there was still a house to tidy, a suitcase to pack and a honeymoon waiting for us the next morning. So we ate more leftover tiramisu, moved slowly around the house getting everything ready and every now and then found ourselves sitting on the sofa doing absolutely nothing.

The Idea That Came at 3am

About a week before the wedding we still hadn't booked our honeymoon.

Bouke wanted a city. I wanted nature. Neither of us felt like flying or dealing with airports, and one night I suddenly woke up with the answer.

Paris.

It's only about five and a half hours from home, and if we stayed somewhere surrounded by greenery with a train station nearby we could have both. It also felt strangely fitting after our wedding, which had somehow turned into what felt like an evening in a little Parisian bar.

The next morning I opened Airbnb and found a small cottage almost immediately. It was surrounded by trees, only ten minutes from the station and exactly what I'd had in mind. I almost kept scrolling, purely out of habit, but there wasn't really any reason to. I showed Bouke the photos, he looked once and said, "Book it."

So I did.

The Drive

The drive there was easy. Bouke drove the whole way while I focused on what I considered the most important responsibility of the trip: making sure we had enough snacks. Normally I enjoy driving too, but by then I was completely exhausted and happily accepted my role as passenger while France slowly appeared outside the window.

The Garden That Wasn't in the Photos

The Airbnb turned out to be even better than we'd expected.

The listing had shown maybe two photos of the garden, so we really had no idea what was waiting for us. We arrived at what felt more like a small estate than someone's garden. There was an enormous lawn, rose bushes everywhere, a little stream running alongside it, an orchard full of apple trees and a pergola tucked away between the greenery. Next door stood a small château that looked as though it belonged in a film.

We unpacked our bags, got into bed and barely moved for the rest of the day.

Slow Days and Resurfacing Memories

The first few days of our honeymoon were wonderfully uneventful. We spent hours lying in the grass, visited a brocante that completely inspired me and slowly worked our way through the pile of wedding cards we had brought with us. Every card brought back another memory from the wedding. A conversation I'd forgotten. Someone's speech. A joke during dinner. A face across the room. It was as if our minds had been storing everything until there was finally space to relive it.

The rest of our days were beautifully ordinary. We found our favourite boulangerie, wandered through another antique shop, spent one day in Paris, had dinner out once and went for a long walk through the forest and the surrounding hills. That was about it.

The Way Home

On the way home I convinced Bouke to take the scenic route before joining the motorway. We drove through rolling hills, tiny French villages and winding country roads, taking our time before heading back to reality. Eventually we'd had our fill and agreed it was time to make our way home.

The last five hours were spent in a car without air conditioning, in thirty-five degree heat, with both of us slowly melting into the seats. It wasn't exactly glamorous, but somewhere between laughing at how warm we were and wondering how much longer we still had to drive, I remember thinking how little it actually mattered where we were. We could be walking through Paris, lying in the grass outside our cottage or sitting in traffic on a French motorway. Being together made even the ordinary moments feel special.

Somewhere near Amiens we joined the motorway again.

Remember I told you at the beginning of this blog that we'd be coming back to the baby?

Well, this is where that story begins.

One moment we were talking about absolutely nothing in particular. The next, something shifted inside me so suddenly that I burst into tears.

The only words that come close to describe this experience are these. I felt our baby's soul enter my field and my body. Imagine stepping into heaven, a space so full of white light that it almost feels alive. The moment you step inside, it's as if the light itself sings one gentle, heavenly "aaah," welcoming you home. I've never experienced so much love all at once. It was overwhelming in the most beautiful way. I felt complete. I felt home.

Looking Back

When I look back now, I can't help but smile at the timing of it all. Only a few days earlier we had promised each other forever, and somewhere on a motorway near Amiens our little family quietly began.

The weeks that followed were nothing like I expected. They were messy, confronting, exhausting, emotional and beautiful all at the same time.

I'll tell you all about that in the next blog.

Thank you for reading and I wish you a lovely day